Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
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