atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
My vagina just clenched in fear
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
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