It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Randomize
