i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Randomize
