Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Randomize
