It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
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