I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
