woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Can I color on your dick again?
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
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