get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
