sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
He had one of those small greek statue penises
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
