Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
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