Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Randomize
