First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
