i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
