i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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