If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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