Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
