She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
