This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
tell me about the eggs
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize