We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
