16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
And my parents said I crawled through the house
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Randomize
