you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
