Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
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