so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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