I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
