Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Randomize
