My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize
