Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
What drink are we having for lunch?
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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