every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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