I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
Randomize
