yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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