so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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