Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
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