quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
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