OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Randomize
