just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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