Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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