Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize