i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
