I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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