Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
