420 ftw
No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
