He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize
