you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
