so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
