i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
