the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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