Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Randomize
