im about as happy as oj after his trial
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize