i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
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