So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
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