Are we in a gay sports bar?
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
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