You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
